'Not a question of black or white, but whether I was good enough on court'

When former cricketer Laxman Sivaramakrishnan stepped down from the BCCI commentary panel, citing concerns over colourism and unequal opportunity, it reopened an uncomfortable conversation around bias in Indian sport. For tennis iconVijay Amritraj, that is familiar territory. In an interview with Prajwal Hegde, he reflects on navigating prejudice, his mother’s influence, and the contrasting personalities of Alcaraz and SinnerHave you experienced discrimination for your skin colour?Some commentators have said they don’t like me. I’m not quite sure if that entails a colour, race or religion bar. It seems like, hey, I don’t like you for whatever reason, but the greatest thing about sport has been the quality of merit. I don’t know about this particular case (Sivaramakrishnan). It’s hard to imagine someone was left out of the main stage or of an interview segment because of his colour. The quality of commentary, presentation, coming back with immediate reaction to the player’s answers is a talent on its own. Not every great player has become a good commentator or presenter. It is hard for me to think of it that way, but the sad part is, if he did go through something, it can affect you personally. I certainly feel for him. It does things to you internally that a lot of us won’t know. The question is, how do you get out of it? This is not only your profession, your bread and butter, but it is also a game that you love.How does one get over a bias like that?Let me try to explain it with an anecdote. I was playing a tournament in New Hampshire (New England) in 1973. Rod Laver and Jimmy Connors were playing too. First, tennis was a white sport (back then), secondly, the entire hotel, where the tournament was held, was full of elderly white Americans. Dinner at night was a coat-and-tie event. I was 19 and wasn’t able to wear coats and ties constantly, so I would come down for dinner in a Madras shirt, jeans and kolhapuri chappals. As I walked across, I felt the eyes of the room pierce the back of my head. Then, I won on Monday, Tuesday and in the quarters I beat Laver after being down several match points. In the final, I ended up playing Connors, who had me 2-5 in the third set, with two match points. There were about 8,000 people in that beautiful setting, all white, and I would say only two in the crowd were for Connors. I ended up winning and when I came for dinner that evening, several of the people in the room were wearing chappals. I draw that analogy for the simple reason that there are lots of things that can be overcome by the way you are and the way you’re able to get into the minds of people and what they like to believe.What did that 19-year-old tell himself when he looked in the mirror on all those evenings in New Hampshire?Coat-and-tie was the expectation, it was my fault that I didn’t have it. That’s economics, right? You know, where you come from, the way you are, and the belief you have in yourself, the dreams that get you this far. You’re coming from the late-60s, early-70s Madras to a world that you are not exposed to at all. Then to go there and compete with the best without having anything of what they had or what they grew up with...That’s what sports taught me, that you can compete at the highest level, because I’m good enough to do that. It wasn’t a question of whether I was black or white, Christian, Muslim, Hindu, but whether I was good enough.Did you feel the colour of your skin more in India than you did outside?The honest answer to that would probably be, if I did, I didn’t know it. My mother used to always tell us, don’t ever complain, just make sure that you’re the best. So, in ’72 on Christmas Day, when I won the Nationals for the first time beating Ramanathan Krishnan in Kolkata, and Anand (Amritraj) and I won the doubles, and my younger brother, Ashok, won the juniors all on the same day, it didn’t matter what colour or religion or language you spoke. I think mom’s words are very relevant.My mother was a wonderfully ordinary person, who did extraordinary things with my life. How do people like that get the opportunity to tell a child who wasn’t good enough that you have to be good enough to be able to do this? So, I think, yes, I’m sure it was there at some point in time, but I was so focused on being the best in what we were doing.What did you make of Carlos Alcaraz’s outburst during the Miami Open?You look at Alcaraz and (Jannik) Sinner, they are both world number ones and have a different way about them. The way they play, the way they are on court and their interaction with spectators. Alcaraz is a very, very nice version of Connors, in the way he interacts with the crowd, smiles, and the variety in his game. He’s got everything and draws a comparison with Roger Federer.When you look at a guy like Sinner, I think, he put in even more work to be a world number one, like (Ivan) Lendl. I think from Alcaraz’s perspective, if he gets a little up and down in his mind, it is good for him to take a break, more than it is for Sinner. Two different personalities, you got to give them that leeway.